Thank you for leaving my pc speakers on, I’ll be sure to remember to thank you when they burn out.
Thank you for taking out the rubbish like you said you would 3 days ago, I’ll be sure to remember that when I’m picking up the rubbish off the floor.
Thank you for emptying your overflowing ashtray, I’ll remember to think of you fondly when I need to replace my R1300 computer keyboard due to ash damage.
Thank you for tidying up something, I’ll be sure to tell my parents that you did your best by doing nothing.
Thank you for putting up the bathroom cabinet, I’ll be sure to remind myself about that when I trip over it again.
Thank you for doing some washing, I’ll be sure to remember that when I’m picking up your dirty clothes off the bathroom floor.
Thank you for drinking out all the wine in the house. I’ll be sure to tell the suppliers that I can’t tell them how the samples were, because I never got to taste them.
Thank you for going shopping. I see our kitchen shelves are still nice and empty.
Thank you for lying to me by telling me you were job hunting when the computer history clearly shows you were playing games, I’ll be sure to remember that when I’m homeless because you couldn’t pay your half of the rent.
Thank you for reminding me how I work 6days a week for NOTHING. I’ll remember that while you’re sitting at the pub/home drinking/playing pc games.
Thank you for sitting in the pub and drinking beer while I slave away work thinking you’re making an effort, I’ll remember that when the debt collectors come knocking on my door.
THANK YOU for making me think back to the days when I was better off alone, I’ll be sure to remember you when I think that being alone and miserable is worse than being with you.